An Irish nun is sitting on the curb, sipping a bottle of stout and obviously drunk out of her mind. The town constable walks up to her and says, "Sure, now Sister Colleen and why'd ya be doing a think like this?"

The sister replies, "Oh now, it's not fer meself I done it fer. I done it fer the Mother Superiror to cure her constipation."

The perplexed policeman looked askance at this and asked, "And how might it be that yer present state could have anything to do with the Mother Superior's constipation?"

To which Sister Colleen says, "When she sees me this way, she'll be shittin' a brick."